


double chocolate hot chocolate with extra whipped cream. and sprinkles.

by unmatchedhellraiser



Category: Psych
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shop, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-03
Updated: 2013-01-03
Packaged: 2017-11-23 11:29:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/621639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unmatchedhellraiser/pseuds/unmatchedhellraiser
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lassiter goes into the same coffee shop every day. Shawn is an annoyingly persistent barista.</p>
            </blockquote>





	double chocolate hot chocolate with extra whipped cream. and sprinkles.

"C'mon, Lassie."

"I told you to stop calling me that."

"Maybe I wouldn't have to if you'd tell me your first name."

"You don't need to know my first name."

"Aw, but then what am I going to put in the little name box next to your phone number?"

"You don't have my phone number."

"Yet."

Lassiter goes into the same coffee shop every day.

Shawn is an annoyingly persistent barista.

Lassiter always orders the same thing, glares while he orders it, barks out one word when asked for his name; sometimes two, when he feels like "detective" is necessary.

Shawn starts making up first names to write on his cup; Hans Lassiter, Reginald Lassiter, Detective Grumpypants Lassiter, the artist formerly known as Lassiter, Lassie "Come Home" Lassiter, Son of Lassiter, one that wasn't so much a name as a series clucks and snaps and thus proved a little harder for Shawn to write out (that one was fun, Shawn's pretty sure there's a new line on Lassiter's forehead completely dedicated to him for that one).

Lassiter threatens to talk to the manager, threatens to have Shawn fired, threatens to discharge his weapon (the joke Shawn makes at that is filthy and delightful, and makes Lassie's eyes bug out and his mouth become a tight little line), and yet he keeps going back.

Shawn's pretty sure he knows why, even if Lassie hasn't figured it out yet.

"One drink."

"No."

"Just one time, I'll be a perfect gentleman."

"No."

"I'll pay for your drink, open doors for you, I'll even let you walk on my coat if you want. It's not raining, but we could probably find a puddle. Or make one, if you really want to get the full effect of my gentlemanly ways."

"Spencer, I don't even like you."

"Yeah you do."

"No, I don't."

"Yeaahhhh, you do."

"You're delusional."

"You're repressed, sexually frustrated, graying, and divorced even though you haven't come to terms with it yet. And you like me."

"I--"

"I dig the salt and pepper by the way, don't worry. It's nice."

Lassiter hates this annoying, self-righteous, ridiculous, aggravating barista; but every time he thinks it it feels more like a lie.

Shawn doesn't know why he's so fascinated by this cop, you would think he'd had enough of that for a lifetime, but the chase has always been the fun part and he can figure out why when he gets there.

Lassiter still refuses to tell Shawn his first name, but it's more out of playfulness than annoyance at being asked (he would never let Shawn know that, though).

Shawn's known Lassie's first name since he looked him up the day after they met, but he'll never tell.

"Carlton."

Lassiter knows with that one word that he's giving in.

Shawn knows with that one word that he's in for more than he bargained for, so he starts trying even harder.

"Your eyes are an ocean."

"..."

"Your breasts are also an ocean."

"I don't have breasts."

"Now, now, Lassie. Everyone has breasts. Don't be sexist."

Lassiter has gotten to the point that he's having to keep a tight rein on himself to keep from smiling at this idiot; he's lost all hope, even O'Hara has started asking why he seems... happy when he comes into the station every morning.

Shawn allows himself an exuberant fist pump every time he can see a little of Lassie's composure slipping away (so far, attempts at terrible poetry are winning; a few more great one-liners and he's sure he'll get a smile, maybe even a laugh).

"Woo me."

"What?"

"I demand to be wooed."

"Is that a sexual reference?"

"You've been trying for two months. You won. Now, what are you going to do about it? Woo me."

"If I've really won, you'll stop using the word 'woo'."

"..."

"I close at nine. Meet me here."

Lassiter has no idea what he's doing.

Shawn knows exactly what he's doing (no, he doesn't).

"Come in, sit down. Loosen your tie? Maybe even slouch a little, it'll be good for you."

"In.. here? In the coffee shop. We aren't going anywhere else."

"Yes, yes, and correct. We're on a coffee date. A coffee date in a neutral and familiar location where you won't threaten to shoot anyone. Except me, but at this point your threats are less threatening and more fluffy and endearing."

"Nothing about me is fluffy."

"Keep telling yourself that, champ. What do you want? The usual? I'm gonna go with your usual. Now sit down."

"... Okay."

Lassiter still has no idea what he's doing.

Shawn is absolutely smitten.

"What is that?"

"That's your usual."

"No, that."

"That would be a double chocolate hot chocolate with extra whipped cream. And sprinkles. It is a fine specimen of never-ending deliciousness. Don't doubt the deliciousness, Lassie."

Lassiter doesn't know how, but he's ended up on a coffee date with Shawn Spencer and it's... good; he's talking and smiling and bantering and this guy is as annoying as he is charming and Lassiter never expected anything like it.

Shawn thinks he's starting to figure out the why; the why that begins and ends with this grumpy detective and the way his eyes light up a little when something Shawn says actually makes him smile.

"Spencer."

"Yes, Lassie."

"Your chair is practically on top of mine."

"Well, would you look at that. It is. I'm not sure these chairs could be any closer if they tried. These chair must really like each other. And who am I to break up such a loving bond? I am not a bond breaker. These chairs shall not be parted. I won't stand for it."

"Shut up."

"No can do, Lassaroo. My thoughts are plentiful and don't do the whole not making words come out of my mouth thing very well. You'll learn to find it exceedingly charming."

"Spencer?"

"Yep."

"Shut up."

Lassiter wants this.

Shawn wants to see Lassie make the first move (and Shawn always gets what he wants).

"You've got a little.."

"Hmmm?"

"Shawn, you've got some... whipped cream on your.."

"...?"

"Just hold still."

"Okay... what are you.. Lassie are you... mmmf."

"I told you to hold still."

"How am I supposed to hold still? You just licked my nose. You licked my nose, and then you kissed me. How would any man hold still under such a beautiful assault as that? Assault me again."

"Any time."


End file.
